Father's Day is in two days, and you are almost five. Your dad was hospitalized again last month, but this time you took everything in stride because he did talk to you everyday.
Since he's been back, he hasn't been himself. You're just too young to understand, but you feel his rejection. I know you want approval, he's just to depressed to even approve of himself.
So this Father's Day, you have gone all out. Kid, you are seriously impressive. We went camping a week before Father's Day and we went into a gas station. You spotted an LED light keychain and a guitar keychain and you begged me to buy it for you so you could give it to him. I told you that you had to keep a secret, and you solemnly vowed to obey.
And you did. You hid it in the trailer that entire weekend. Then you put in a safe place in your room when we got home. During the course of the week, you added personal cards you made, with some of the best pictures I have ever seen you draw and said you took your time and tried really hard because you love you dad your so much.
Last night you had your secret box out to show me all the treasures you had gathered for your dad. He came in unexpectedly and I told you, "hurry, daddy is here." The look on your face was urgent and your intent was clear. You wanted this to be a special surprise and you did not want to spoil it. You managed to pack everything up back in your box and it disappeared back into your room.
You didn't stop there though. You took legos this morning from his old lego toy box and made a race car. You poured over the details telling me about where the engine was etc. You told me you hoped Daddy would like it.
Oh Jace, he loves you. He will like it. He will LOVE it. He's having a hard time right now pal. I hope one day you will understand and not hold it against him.
Today it was time to wrap the presents, and you had to do it yourself. There is a ton of tape but it was all taped with love. You wanted it to be perfect. "I hope daddy is happy now" you said hopefully.
