Great day yesterday, feeling good, and then...he pushes down a baby

For the past two days, Jace had a great day!  He was still mischievous and naughty, but he took his time-outs without protest, and even calmed himself down from a temper tantrum at church.  (Normally he would be getting carried out). 

I told my mom last night things were looking up!  Maybe he just needed to get in the swing of the new routine and have clear and consistent boundaries set that he will have now that I'm home.  

Well, today he woke up on the wrong side of the bed.  I should document also though that he had a waffle I thought was gluten free but was actually just whole grain, and he had some breakfast sausage.  Just want to keep track of this stuff because the past two days he had gluten free waffles.

Anyway, Ashlynn and him were so good for the babysitter yesterday I told them I would take them to the park, but it rained so I had to take them today.  Ashlynn totally deserved it, but we barely got there.  Fighting over how was to be line leader ensued and was a meltdown.  Ahhh

At the park he was listening "ok" but then he found himself with a baby not even 1 year old.  She was standing up trying to play with a steering wheel when he just pushed her down so he could play with it.

I immediately ran over and put him in timeout, but since he won't stay in timeout, old Jace came out.  Screaming, cries that he didn't want to be in timeout, and then kicking me ensued.  I remained calm and told them it was time to go.  It's not really fair to Ashlynn she had to pay for her brother's bad behavior, but what can I do?

He went to time out at home and then got out.  He was playing with his tablet and A with my iPad when she got up to get a drink.  He grabbed the iPad and declared it was his.  I told him no, that it was still her turn and here a crash.  

Yep.  He threw it.  Why I decided to trust him after he already broke my other one IDK.  I believe in second chances.  

Why don't they work with him??  What am I going to do??  There is a popular news story right now about a kid who went to Stanford who is a great swimmer that raped a girl and only got 6 months.  In a shameful display of elitest entitlement and affluenza, the father appealed to the judge that he shouldn't have to pay 20 years for "20 minutes of action" and that he feels so bad because he used to love to make ribeye steak for his son, and now he won't even eat it because he's depressed.  

What about the girl he violated??  What about the fact that she is forever scared now to walk out alone?  The fact that she is emotionally scarred forever, the fact that she will have trust issues, probably need therapy, the list goes on.  Oh it doesn't matter because poor good 'ol boy shouldn't have his life ruined too.

How do I prevent this from being Jace?  How??  I hate to say it but he lacks empathy and sometimes just acts like an asshole.  Okay, A LOT of the times.  

I read somewhere empathy can be taught.  Dear God teach me how to teach him this.  I mean he pushed down a BABY!!!  WTH is wrong with this kid?

Crying and it's only 8:00 AM on the second day of summer break

Jace's behavior can be perfect.  This is especially true when Ashlynn isn't around.  Just her presence, for whatever reason, sets him off.  This morning, he had already kicked her, but in his defense she was kicking him too.

I fed him gluten free waffles which he actually ate.  His behavior does seem better when he doesn't have gluten and when he eats more meat....both of which are hard with his picky eating.

After breakfast though, he flew around the house in a manic frenzy.  He was hitting the book Ashlynn was reading, then he threw markers at it.  I told him if he touched the book one more time he would go to time out.  He did of course, because listening isn't his thing, and that ended him with continually slamming the door.  I told him to stop or he would be in the car seat.  He's in the car seat of course, because again, listening isn't his thing.  While putting him in though I was scratched, slapped in the face, and he tried to bite me.  Awesome morning.

I came out here to write this and I'm crying.  I'm failing him.  I don't know what to do. He is literally raging in there right now.  He is a maniac when he's like this. What do I do?  How do I help him?

I have a sticker chart again rewarding positive behavior.  It's of course working great for Ashlynn.  He wants stickers too, but if he doesn't earn one he starts raging again.


My God, he's only going to be 4.  What happens when he's bigger and stronger than me?? Why does he hit me??

I'm sad and I don't know what to do. :(